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Givnology Wellness Arts
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The Clown Scientists have found that all our problems can be placed under

one heading: Seriousness. Seriousness is the leading cause of everything

from Cancer to Reincarnation.

Scientists from the Clown Academy have already

discovered a new source of healing. It is a psychic energy point located

between the heart chakra and the throat chakra. It is called the Clown

Chakra. If people are feeling miserable, if they have financial problems, if

their relationship situation is the pits, if they are in ill health, if they

need to sue people, if they find fault with their brother, then obviously,

their Clown Chakra is closed. When this happens, the Scientists have

observed under a high-powered microscope that the cells of every organ

display a sad face, and when the Clown Chakra is open and functioning

normally, the cells display a happy face.

The Scientists realized that if a person is ill, it is because his mind has

projected guilt onto the cells and his body has forced out the love that is

normally found within each cell of the body. The cells are therefore saying,

"I lack Love," or "ILL for short. The Scientists also discovered that all

disease is due to the fact that the cells are out of ease or dis-eased.

When the Clown Chakra is open and working (or rather playing) properly, the

psychic mechanism sucks up the misery, pain, anger, resentment, grievances,

unhappiness etc, and converts the energy into tiny red heart-shaped

balloons. The red heart-shaped balloons contain Love and Joy. These balloons

are directed to the dis-eased cell or situation and a happy face appears

instantly. When the light enters the darkness, the darkness is gone.

Sometimes these red heart-shaped balloons are called endorphins, due to the

fact that when anyone experiences them, the feeling of separation ends. They

experience being back home with All That Is, and hence are no longer an

orphan. This is the well known end-orphan (endorphin) effect.

So, if you think someone is attacking you, Clown Scientists recommend that you

visualize sending that person red heart-shaped balloons filled with Love and Joy.

Remember to keep your Clown Chakra open and remember to laugh.

Seriousness causes reincarnation.
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Having served as an altar boy at the First Church of Fun in Berkeley one year on St. Stupid's Day, one might think I should be an authority on the subject of humor. I'm not, but I can remember a few initiation riddles from the Grand Clown Master Wavy Gravy himself:

Q. What is brown and rings like a bell?
A. Dung!

Q. What great American city begins with the sound of the creation of the universe and ends with a really great laugh?
A. Omaha

Q. Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs?
A. Because he doesn't want the world to know he's having unprotected sex with a chicken.

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